Do you have a best friend? Someone you can tell everything to? Someone who loves you unconditionally and is always on your side? Someone who accepts you for who you are and what is important to you? Someone who always wants the very best for you and knows you deserve it? If you don't have that at this moment, I will tell you how you can have that 'someone' in your life TODAY.
My best girl friend and I have been friends since we were little girls, and I'm so lucky to have her and several other very close friends that have been in my life since I was very young. My husband is also my best friend, and I also consider God my best friend. My kids and my parents and other extended family are also my best friends.
And you know who else? Me.
When I was a teenager, I was told by someone very wise and kind, "Live so that you will be your own best friend, so that wherever you go by yourself, you will never be alone."
If you have never thought of yourself as your own friend, consider the wonderful possibilities of that concept! You will always have someone with you that you enjoy being around. You will always have someone with you that shares your dreams and knows you can make them happen. You can be your own cheerleader and biggest fan. You can love yourself unconditionally and want the very best for yourself and your life. Being your own best friend puts you in a different thought pattern and is very emotionally healthy and beneficial. By treating yourself the way you would treat your best friend you will feel happier and more at peace with you. No matter what has happened in your life, and no matter who has failed to love you the way you wanted, you can still have the love you deserve and need. And when you love yourself, others naturally love you, too. It's very appealing to be around people that have a love and respect for themselves.
Just as you would never tell your best friend that they don't deserve the life they want, or that they are less than absolutely perfect, you shouldn't be saying anything like to yourself either. Talk to yourself the same way you talk to your other friends...with love and respect and appreciation. I love my best friend to the moon and back....and we always say that to each other. Saying that to yourself puts you in a whole different mindset and makes you just....feel better.
If you are fortunate enough to have one or more best friends in your life, I am so happy for you and you already know how blessed you are. If you are lacking that in your life, you can still have it today by making friends with YOU.....and in turn that will attract more friends to you. And you will feel more happiness and peace.
Love, Michelle
Saturday, September 24, 2011
Thursday, August 25, 2011
The Universe is Listening
The words you speak have power, my friend. More power than you realize. And, the Universe hangs on your every word!
You are a very powerful being, and the words you speak create your world. We have both internal and external dialogues, and what we say to ourselves affects what we say to others.
What kind of things do you say to yourself? Oh boy….I know, I’ve said them, too. Things like, ‘I could never….’, or ‘I don’t deserve that….’, or ‘I wasn’t meant to have….’. With those kinds of beliefs and inner dialogues, how does that come out when we talk with others? ‘I can’t do….’, and ‘I will never have….’, and ‘That’s impossible for me….’ Then we add in our actions based on our beliefs.
Yikes! What are we creating here?
The good news is, we have the power to create something different. Would you like to know how?
Open yourself up, my dear friend, and think about the way you would LIKE your life to be, not necessarily what is it right now. And then speak to yourself and others the way you would if your life was really like that. Did you catch that? Live and dream and BE in that place as if you were already there. How would you behave? What would you say? How would you feel?
Then speak those things out loud. Someone who is happy and peaceful and has all they desire would never say to themselves or anyone else that they aren’t good enough, or that something was impossible for them. They would simply say that they would find a way, there must be a way. And then they would find it. Just as you will.
Human beings are the crown of God’s creations, and you are so beloved of Him. He created you to be successful, happy and abundant. Believe it, because it is absolutely the truth. I do understand that when the storms of life are gathered around you and you are in a dark place, you don’t believe that. But even in those moments, you wish it were true…you may even hope it is true. Trust me just a little and know that you were meant for all things good and all that you desire.
Let’s you and I be aware of things we say to ourselves, and the words we speak out loud. I want to create a glorious future, don’t you? So let’s work on that together, you and I. Today let’s speak of our perfect life and all that we want as if we have it. Let’s put our order in…the Universe is listening.
Love,
Michelle
Friday, July 29, 2011
Want a Happy Marriage?
My kids are growing up. My daughter is getting married in two weeks, and this will be our fifth child to get married. I'm so happy for my girl and her fiance, and I've been thinking about all the things I want to tell them. I have so many things I've learned over time that I want them to know....that I want every young couple to know. So in a tribute to my daughter and her fiance, and to young couples everywhere, here are a few things that can contribute to a happy marriage.
1. Be faithful. You are committing to each other, so be REALLY committed. Let no one come between the two of you....not a coworker, not an old flame, not a friend , not someone new you meet. No one. Be completely true and faithful to your spouse in every way. You both deserve that.
2. Be one in purpose. The two of you make one family unit now, and nothing or no one is more important than your marriage. Set goals for your future that you work on together. Include each other in all decisions and in every part of life.
3. Pray together. Invite God to be a part of your marriage and let Him guide you as you build your life together. No one loves the two of you more than He does, and He truly wants you to make it. Let Him help you.
4. Speak kindly to each other. A soft answer can turn things around when conversations become tense and opinions differ. The relationship is more important than being right or getting your way.
5. Never forget that you are sweethearts first. You may become parents, business partners, or have other roles together, but first and foremost, you are sweethearts. I love to see older couples walking hand in hand in the park, or sitting next to each other in an old truck.....still sweethearts after all those years. I want to grow up to be just like them.
6. Smile at each other. Yes, you see each other every day, and life can become commonplace and mundane. So smile at your sweetheart when you wake up, when they or you get home from work or school, when you are in a crowd of people and you suddenly look at each other, when you are eating dinner together, whenever they don't expect it. It will warm both of your hearts and create a feeling of togetherness and understanding.
7. Do kind little things for each other. The other day I opened up my lunch bag, and found that the night before, my husband had stashed a little bag of white chocolate covered pretzels in there for me to find. He knows I like them, and finding them made me feel so loved. It was a small, sweet gesture that made my whole day. It's all the little things added up together that makes a great marriage and life.
Really, I could ramble on about all this for days, so I'll leave it at this. If both people want the marriage to last and be as good as it can be, you have a winning formula. One cannot make it work alone, but together you can accomplish anything. My love and prayers go with all of you that are embarking on this new adventure.
Love,
Michelle
1. Be faithful. You are committing to each other, so be REALLY committed. Let no one come between the two of you....not a coworker, not an old flame, not a friend , not someone new you meet. No one. Be completely true and faithful to your spouse in every way. You both deserve that.
2. Be one in purpose. The two of you make one family unit now, and nothing or no one is more important than your marriage. Set goals for your future that you work on together. Include each other in all decisions and in every part of life.
3. Pray together. Invite God to be a part of your marriage and let Him guide you as you build your life together. No one loves the two of you more than He does, and He truly wants you to make it. Let Him help you.
4. Speak kindly to each other. A soft answer can turn things around when conversations become tense and opinions differ. The relationship is more important than being right or getting your way.
5. Never forget that you are sweethearts first. You may become parents, business partners, or have other roles together, but first and foremost, you are sweethearts. I love to see older couples walking hand in hand in the park, or sitting next to each other in an old truck.....still sweethearts after all those years. I want to grow up to be just like them.
6. Smile at each other. Yes, you see each other every day, and life can become commonplace and mundane. So smile at your sweetheart when you wake up, when they or you get home from work or school, when you are in a crowd of people and you suddenly look at each other, when you are eating dinner together, whenever they don't expect it. It will warm both of your hearts and create a feeling of togetherness and understanding.
7. Do kind little things for each other. The other day I opened up my lunch bag, and found that the night before, my husband had stashed a little bag of white chocolate covered pretzels in there for me to find. He knows I like them, and finding them made me feel so loved. It was a small, sweet gesture that made my whole day. It's all the little things added up together that makes a great marriage and life.
Really, I could ramble on about all this for days, so I'll leave it at this. If both people want the marriage to last and be as good as it can be, you have a winning formula. One cannot make it work alone, but together you can accomplish anything. My love and prayers go with all of you that are embarking on this new adventure.
Love,
Michelle
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Can Painful Memories Be Erased?
Is it possible to erase painful memories? One of my readers expressed that concern to me this week, and it is a very valid question. It's natural to want anything that hurts to go away, and memories of betrayal or rejection are among the most painful. I don't think my new friend and I are alone in that sentiment.
You know in your heart of hearts that aside from a lobotomy, complete erasure of any memory, painful or not, is not really possible. We can try to block it out, distract ourselves with some other activity, pretend it's not there, but those nagging memories still pop up, don't they? Relentless little boogers.
What IS possible, is to put those memories in their place, and ease the pain they cause us. And to do that, we must let them be a part of our life rather than trying to banish them from existence. What if, instead of trying to get rid of them, we look at them a little differently? Seeing something from a different perspective will accomplish what we are looking for.....less pain. More happy feelings. More PEACE. You KNOW how I love peace.
So how, exactly, do we do that? I don't claim to have all the answers, so I can only tell what has worked for me and others like me.
First, decide that what someone else did to you does not define you. Their opinions and actions are theirs, not yours, not anyone else. Instead of thinking of that person as 'the one' that you lost, realize that they are just one in a group of individuals that you 'tried on' and they weren't the best fit for you. Just someone from your past that didn't appreciate how great you are. Their loss. They were a stepping stone for you to learn what you could, and decide what you definitely want and don't want. When you take away their supreme importance in your life, the pain they can inflict even years after what they did, is lessened considerably.
Next, focus on the good. The good in your life currently, the good things you learned in the past, the blessings you have been given, and the person you have become because of your experiences. It's like when you look at a painting and you focus on one certain thing, the rest looks blurred and not as important. Memories and life experiences are like that too....focus on the good and the other parts will blur and fade.
Then, make some new memories. Big, fun, happy recent memories help to minimize past memories. And being satisfied and happy with your current life is what everyone wants, right? Plan some great things for yourself and enjoy them as they unfold. Soon the memories of painful things in your past will be just that....a distant memory. Who? Oh, yeah...I almost forgot about them ;) Okay, maybe that is an over-statement, but you get the idea.
And last, forgive them. I wrote about forgiveness a couple of months ago in this blog, so you may want to refer to 'Set Yourself Free'. To break the hold those painful memories have on our lives, we need to forgive the ones who hurt us...whether they asked for it or not, and whether they deserve it or not. This is all about you finding peace and happiness, my darling friend....it's not about them. Let God heal you by forgiving all His children. He appreciates and loves your forgiving heart, and He blesses you ten-fold for your effort by healing your broken heart and giving you more than you ever dreamed possible. This last thing makes the biggest difference and does the most for you. It did for me.
You are made up of a million things....genes, memories, experiences, beliefs, gifts, talents, actions....I could go on and on. You are not made up of 'them'. Let 'them' go.....and embrace YOU.
My best to you, my friend.
Love, Michelle
You know in your heart of hearts that aside from a lobotomy, complete erasure of any memory, painful or not, is not really possible. We can try to block it out, distract ourselves with some other activity, pretend it's not there, but those nagging memories still pop up, don't they? Relentless little boogers.
What IS possible, is to put those memories in their place, and ease the pain they cause us. And to do that, we must let them be a part of our life rather than trying to banish them from existence. What if, instead of trying to get rid of them, we look at them a little differently? Seeing something from a different perspective will accomplish what we are looking for.....less pain. More happy feelings. More PEACE. You KNOW how I love peace.
So how, exactly, do we do that? I don't claim to have all the answers, so I can only tell what has worked for me and others like me.
First, decide that what someone else did to you does not define you. Their opinions and actions are theirs, not yours, not anyone else. Instead of thinking of that person as 'the one' that you lost, realize that they are just one in a group of individuals that you 'tried on' and they weren't the best fit for you. Just someone from your past that didn't appreciate how great you are. Their loss. They were a stepping stone for you to learn what you could, and decide what you definitely want and don't want. When you take away their supreme importance in your life, the pain they can inflict even years after what they did, is lessened considerably.
Next, focus on the good. The good in your life currently, the good things you learned in the past, the blessings you have been given, and the person you have become because of your experiences. It's like when you look at a painting and you focus on one certain thing, the rest looks blurred and not as important. Memories and life experiences are like that too....focus on the good and the other parts will blur and fade.
Then, make some new memories. Big, fun, happy recent memories help to minimize past memories. And being satisfied and happy with your current life is what everyone wants, right? Plan some great things for yourself and enjoy them as they unfold. Soon the memories of painful things in your past will be just that....a distant memory. Who? Oh, yeah...I almost forgot about them ;) Okay, maybe that is an over-statement, but you get the idea.
And last, forgive them. I wrote about forgiveness a couple of months ago in this blog, so you may want to refer to 'Set Yourself Free'. To break the hold those painful memories have on our lives, we need to forgive the ones who hurt us...whether they asked for it or not, and whether they deserve it or not. This is all about you finding peace and happiness, my darling friend....it's not about them. Let God heal you by forgiving all His children. He appreciates and loves your forgiving heart, and He blesses you ten-fold for your effort by healing your broken heart and giving you more than you ever dreamed possible. This last thing makes the biggest difference and does the most for you. It did for me.
You are made up of a million things....genes, memories, experiences, beliefs, gifts, talents, actions....I could go on and on. You are not made up of 'them'. Let 'them' go.....and embrace YOU.
My best to you, my friend.
Love, Michelle
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Thoughts Become Things
This week one of the biggest dreams I had for my life came true....earlier than I had imagined it would! I feel so grateful....and at moments I am in wonder at how it all happened.
It can happen for you, too. Let's explore how this all works.
Think of the one thing you want most in life. Think about it every day. See yourself having what you want most. What does your life look like when you have that one thing you want most? Can you see it all in your mind?
That's how it all begins....dreaming, thinking, concentrating, seeing it all in your mind. You will get impressions of things you should do to make it happen as time goes on...and that's when you should ACT! One step at a time, the pieces will come together. It may takes hours, days, weeks, months, or even years...but it WILL happen. I've written here before that what you want wants YOU! And the Universe and God is just as happy to help you get what you want as you are to receive it. Believe that in your heart, because it is absolutely true.
If one course of action doesn't work out, pray for some inspiration, and when it comes, act on that. Sometimes God wants to see how bad we want it....are we willing to keep trying even when the going gets tough? Do we have the faith that He really can help us? That we really do deserve it? Of course He can, and of course you do. If it's important to you, never give up. Never!
One of the most important aspects of moving on and being happy is the ability to see the kind of life you want in your mind. Really see it. Author Mike Dooley says, "Thoughts become things." Uh, yeah slightly. Okay, hugely. Positive or negative, thoughts become things. So why not think some really good things?! Daydream often! Give yourself permission to daydream and think about all the things you want in your life. Think about what would bring you joy and happiness....FEEL how it will feel when you have it. That seeing and feeling is what creates it and gets it moving toward you.
I want you to have everything you've ever dreamed of, my friend. And more importantly, God wants you to have everything you've ever dreamed of. So dream and dream and dream....act on His inspiration. Together the two of you can do anything!
Love,
Michelle
It can happen for you, too. Let's explore how this all works.
Think of the one thing you want most in life. Think about it every day. See yourself having what you want most. What does your life look like when you have that one thing you want most? Can you see it all in your mind?
That's how it all begins....dreaming, thinking, concentrating, seeing it all in your mind. You will get impressions of things you should do to make it happen as time goes on...and that's when you should ACT! One step at a time, the pieces will come together. It may takes hours, days, weeks, months, or even years...but it WILL happen. I've written here before that what you want wants YOU! And the Universe and God is just as happy to help you get what you want as you are to receive it. Believe that in your heart, because it is absolutely true.
If one course of action doesn't work out, pray for some inspiration, and when it comes, act on that. Sometimes God wants to see how bad we want it....are we willing to keep trying even when the going gets tough? Do we have the faith that He really can help us? That we really do deserve it? Of course He can, and of course you do. If it's important to you, never give up. Never!
One of the most important aspects of moving on and being happy is the ability to see the kind of life you want in your mind. Really see it. Author Mike Dooley says, "Thoughts become things." Uh, yeah slightly. Okay, hugely. Positive or negative, thoughts become things. So why not think some really good things?! Daydream often! Give yourself permission to daydream and think about all the things you want in your life. Think about what would bring you joy and happiness....FEEL how it will feel when you have it. That seeing and feeling is what creates it and gets it moving toward you.
I want you to have everything you've ever dreamed of, my friend. And more importantly, God wants you to have everything you've ever dreamed of. So dream and dream and dream....act on His inspiration. Together the two of you can do anything!
Love,
Michelle
Sunday, May 15, 2011
The Blessing of Service
When someone helps you or tries to help you, what is your reaction? Do you feel grateful? Or do you feel embarrassed? Or resentful because now you feel you might need to return the favor? Maybe you can relate to all of these, depending on what kind of day you are having. I once heard a man say that he hated when someone did something nice for him because then he felt like he owed them something. Hmmmm......
Let's look at service and acts of kindness in a new way. Let's look at what the giver gets out of it. Doing kind things for others makes one feel warm and happy. For example, my sister in law dropped of a huge basket of fruit, vegetables and bread for our family early Saturday morning. It was so fun to open the door and see all that beautiful food on our front porch! When I called to thank her, she told me how much fun she had doing that for us. She calls herself the Fruit and Veggie Fairy. Of course we appreciated the very kind gesture, especially since my husband is temporarily out of work. And it delighted me to hear to her excitement doing something so generous for someone else. I realized that she loved doing that for our family, and if I had said anything other than, 'Thank you', it might have deflated her happiness.
If you have a hard time accepting acts of service from others, and you say things like, "Oh you didn't need to do that" or "I wish you hadn't done that".....stop yourself, and simply say, "Thank you so much". We all need each other and we all have times when we can help others, and times when we need the help. Sometimes within the same week! It's all a big circle of Give and Receive. Beautiful, don't you think?
Let others help you, especially when you feel vulnerable or wounded. Realize that it is your day or time to receive and there will be a day or time when you are a giver. And having said that, be sure that you complete the circle by giving back when you can. It will make you feel warm and happy, just as it did for those who gave to you. It also creates balance in your life.
And that brings me to my last point. What you give to someone else does not have to be the same thing you received. We all have gifts, talents and ways of helping that are unique. You can do things others cannot, and the other way around. Give whatever God blesses you with.....a talent for cooking, a kind listening heart, time to help someone who cannot help themselves, a talent for fixing things....whatever you are good at or whatever you can do. Even making a phone call to cheer someone's day is a lovely act of service and kindness.
I really love that we all have each other and that we are all connected to the same great energy. Let's appreciate and realize our blessings and create some blessings for others.
Love, Michelle
Let's look at service and acts of kindness in a new way. Let's look at what the giver gets out of it. Doing kind things for others makes one feel warm and happy. For example, my sister in law dropped of a huge basket of fruit, vegetables and bread for our family early Saturday morning. It was so fun to open the door and see all that beautiful food on our front porch! When I called to thank her, she told me how much fun she had doing that for us. She calls herself the Fruit and Veggie Fairy. Of course we appreciated the very kind gesture, especially since my husband is temporarily out of work. And it delighted me to hear to her excitement doing something so generous for someone else. I realized that she loved doing that for our family, and if I had said anything other than, 'Thank you', it might have deflated her happiness.
If you have a hard time accepting acts of service from others, and you say things like, "Oh you didn't need to do that" or "I wish you hadn't done that".....stop yourself, and simply say, "Thank you so much". We all need each other and we all have times when we can help others, and times when we need the help. Sometimes within the same week! It's all a big circle of Give and Receive. Beautiful, don't you think?
Let others help you, especially when you feel vulnerable or wounded. Realize that it is your day or time to receive and there will be a day or time when you are a giver. And having said that, be sure that you complete the circle by giving back when you can. It will make you feel warm and happy, just as it did for those who gave to you. It also creates balance in your life.
And that brings me to my last point. What you give to someone else does not have to be the same thing you received. We all have gifts, talents and ways of helping that are unique. You can do things others cannot, and the other way around. Give whatever God blesses you with.....a talent for cooking, a kind listening heart, time to help someone who cannot help themselves, a talent for fixing things....whatever you are good at or whatever you can do. Even making a phone call to cheer someone's day is a lovely act of service and kindness.
I really love that we all have each other and that we are all connected to the same great energy. Let's appreciate and realize our blessings and create some blessings for others.
Love, Michelle
Thursday, April 28, 2011
Inner Peace
What a crazy April my family and I have had! We moved, our daughter got engaged, and my husband lost his job. Between feeling exhausted, excited and scared....somehow I can still feel some inner peace. A gift from God to be sure, because life sure didn't hand it over.
We love our new house and our new neighborhood, but I can tell you that cleaning the old house is right up there with having a root canal or having all my fingernails ripped out with pliers. I know, right? Tell us how you really feel, Michelle. I took a week off work so I could clean the old house and put things away in my new house, and truly, I would rather be at work.
My darling daughter and her fiance are getting married in August, so we have so much to do and plan for, and THIS I am excited about. For this hopeless romantic, weddings are so hopeful and sweet, and I really want my kids to find every happiness life has to offer. I'm so happy for my girl.
And then....the loss of my husband's job. Scary to be sure. The future is uncertain, but also full of possibilities! Maybe this is the greatest thing that can happen....he could go back to school and go into a new field, or at least find a better company to work for. I know we'll be okay and I have to trust that God is in His heaven and watching over all of us. Whatever your life is like this month, I hope that you have some inner peace and that your heart is calm and hopeful.
From my heart to yours......
Love, Michelle
We love our new house and our new neighborhood, but I can tell you that cleaning the old house is right up there with having a root canal or having all my fingernails ripped out with pliers. I know, right? Tell us how you really feel, Michelle. I took a week off work so I could clean the old house and put things away in my new house, and truly, I would rather be at work.
My darling daughter and her fiance are getting married in August, so we have so much to do and plan for, and THIS I am excited about. For this hopeless romantic, weddings are so hopeful and sweet, and I really want my kids to find every happiness life has to offer. I'm so happy for my girl.
And then....the loss of my husband's job. Scary to be sure. The future is uncertain, but also full of possibilities! Maybe this is the greatest thing that can happen....he could go back to school and go into a new field, or at least find a better company to work for. I know we'll be okay and I have to trust that God is in His heaven and watching over all of us. Whatever your life is like this month, I hope that you have some inner peace and that your heart is calm and hopeful.
From my heart to yours......
Love, Michelle
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