I've stepped into an unfamiliar, scary arena. I registered as a contestant in 'The Next Top Self Help Author" contest which begins Februrary 1st. It's a four month, four part contest with the first entry being a video pitch of the author's book. Last fall I published a little ebook on how to file your own divorce, and my new book, which is partially written, is about how to recover from infidelity, and is called, 'Move On, Be Happy". With our entrance fee comes this wonderful 6 month training course from all the experts in the book world...publishers, authors, agents, internet marketers...so it's an incredible opportunity for new authors to learn how to get their message out there.
The training course has already begun and much emphasis is place on what our 'message' is....what is it that we want to tell the world. And then I realized that each person on this planet has a message. Each one is unique based on what our experiences are in life.
So let me ask you, "What is your message? What do you want to share with the world that no one else can give?"
I love the saying, "No one else can sing your song". It says to me that each of us is so important and has something unique to share with the world. If you don't share you message, it will not be shared, because no one else can do it. Can you feel how powerful that really is?
I used to feel so small and feel that my purpose in life was so small....and I was wrong. So I'm going to share my message of hope and healing based on the things I've lived through and learned. A message that is unique to me, and I'm going to do it because of my deep love and compassion for my fellow men and women, and for you specifically, my friend.
I hope you will do the same, in whatever form your message takes. Only you know what that is and what you were put on this planet to do. I hope you will share that wonderful message with the rest of us....the World awaits you!
My best to you-
Michelle
Saturday, January 29, 2011
Sunday, January 23, 2011
The Payoff for Loyalty
In my line of work, I promote Loyalty-to self and family. I see too little of it in society, so I am always striving to encourage and instill it whenever possible.
Loyalty to Self has many components. Let's break it down a little-
Now-what if your spouse does not live by the same creed? What if you cannot trust your spouse?
Well, my dear friend, only you can decide if that is a situation you want to stay in, but I will say this: You be the example and leader. You be loyal to yourself and your spouse and family even if they are not giving you the same, simply because that is who you are and what you feel is right. You are a faithful, loyal spouse. This is too important an issue to play 'an eye for an eye'. Rise above and be the kind of person you want to be and you know you can be. Loyal and respectful to yourself and others. Then if you feel you need to create a different life for yourself, you can do so with a clear conscience and your self worth intact.
My best to you, my friend-
Michelle
Loyalty to Self has many components. Let's break it down a little-
- Loyalty to self also means loyal to your morals and life creed. We all have them whether it is intentional or not. We have all decided in our minds what is right and what is wrong, what we will do and what we will not do. Some people were not taught to have a creed or a set of morals as children, or they have decided to ignore what they were taught. and this is where the problems begin. If you were not taught in your home as a child, I would dare guess that as a human being, you have strong feelings about what is right and wrong. And now that you are an adult, you get to decide what your morals and life creeds are. Maybe you don't agree with what you were taught as a child but you feel stuck in your family traditions. Find what feels right in your heart and deep in your soul. We have so many resources out there-religions, self help conferences and books, mentors and guides. If the creed and morals are a little hard to live by and have some restrictions, you're probably on the right track. Morals and creeds, by definition, are not a free-for-all. Morals and creeds=discipline.
- Because we are connected to our Higher Power or our God, loyalty to self also means loyalty to Him. When things are right between you and your Higher Power, it lays the groundwork for all areas of your life to settle into place. There is a peace that comes into your heart when you feel that strong connection and know that He can count on you, and you can count on Him.
- And finally, loyalty to self also means that you are respectful of yourself in every way, and you expect the same of others. You surround yourself with loving, positive people. You take care of yourself, body and soul.
Now-what if your spouse does not live by the same creed? What if you cannot trust your spouse?
Well, my dear friend, only you can decide if that is a situation you want to stay in, but I will say this: You be the example and leader. You be loyal to yourself and your spouse and family even if they are not giving you the same, simply because that is who you are and what you feel is right. You are a faithful, loyal spouse. This is too important an issue to play 'an eye for an eye'. Rise above and be the kind of person you want to be and you know you can be. Loyal and respectful to yourself and others. Then if you feel you need to create a different life for yourself, you can do so with a clear conscience and your self worth intact.
My best to you, my friend-
Michelle
Monday, January 17, 2011
What is your dream?
Maybe because it's Martin Luther King Jr. Day...maybe because I just took my kids to see the movie 'Tangled', or maybe because I've always been a dreamer-for whatever reason, let's delve into your dreams, shall we?
What do you dream of doing, having or being?
If you've never allowed yourself to go there, be brave and go there now. Give yourself permission and indulge in a few moments of day dreaming. What do you see?
What kind of life would you have if money flowed effortlessly to you and you had no restraints of society?
Where would you live?
What kind of home would you live in?
What would you do with your time and your money?
What would make you truly happy?
Answering these questions is fun...and very powerful! Do you have the answers? Write them down.
You just opened a door, my friend. A door to where everything you've every wanted is granted to you...a place where you can have what you dream. The simple pleasure of allowing yourself to dream just started a creation. The Universe was listening and it has begun to help you attain everything you dream of having, doing or being. Let yourself dream every day, and really FEEL what it will feel like when you have the life you want. The feeling of already having it MAGNETIZES what you want, and it is coming toward you now. What you want wants you! Amazing and incredible, yes. And completely true.
I wrote about the Law of Attraction in an earlier post, and it is the most exciting thing to realize that what you want wants you right back, and is moving toward you simply because you dare to want it. Very brave of you, my friend. And very smart.
Begin to notice all the people throughout history that have done things that others thought couldn't be done. Just because it hasn't been done before, doesn't mean it can't be done. It just means it hasn't been done YET. Be the first! The first in your neighborhood or in your family to do what you've always wanted to do.
It takes courage to dream. I get that sometimes we've been so disappointed so many times that we just put our dreams away, with a lump in our throat and bitter tears swelling in our eyes. I've been there a time or two...or a dozen. But no matter how hard I tried, those dreams just kept coming to the surface, pushing through all the mistrust and pain, begging to be heard and realized. So I stopped fighting them. It was scary, and exhilarating. I let my dreams see daylight and I fed them. I purposely set aside time every day to let them grow and see every detail in my mind, and feel how wonderful it would be to have them realized.
And to my great delight I discovered what power I have over my own life. The biggest and best of my dreams have been fulfilled, and more are on the way! After so many years of thinking that I would never have the life I dreamed of, I'm watching it unfold before me. I feel grateful and blessed, and I want to spread it around. Shout it from the rooftops! DARE TO DREAM, my friends!!!
So if you skipped over those questions I asked you at the beginning, go back and answer them now. Create a whole new great life for yourself. That's my dream for you....
Michelle
What do you dream of doing, having or being?
If you've never allowed yourself to go there, be brave and go there now. Give yourself permission and indulge in a few moments of day dreaming. What do you see?
What kind of life would you have if money flowed effortlessly to you and you had no restraints of society?
Where would you live?
What kind of home would you live in?
What would you do with your time and your money?
What would make you truly happy?
Answering these questions is fun...and very powerful! Do you have the answers? Write them down.
You just opened a door, my friend. A door to where everything you've every wanted is granted to you...a place where you can have what you dream. The simple pleasure of allowing yourself to dream just started a creation. The Universe was listening and it has begun to help you attain everything you dream of having, doing or being. Let yourself dream every day, and really FEEL what it will feel like when you have the life you want. The feeling of already having it MAGNETIZES what you want, and it is coming toward you now. What you want wants you! Amazing and incredible, yes. And completely true.
I wrote about the Law of Attraction in an earlier post, and it is the most exciting thing to realize that what you want wants you right back, and is moving toward you simply because you dare to want it. Very brave of you, my friend. And very smart.
Begin to notice all the people throughout history that have done things that others thought couldn't be done. Just because it hasn't been done before, doesn't mean it can't be done. It just means it hasn't been done YET. Be the first! The first in your neighborhood or in your family to do what you've always wanted to do.
It takes courage to dream. I get that sometimes we've been so disappointed so many times that we just put our dreams away, with a lump in our throat and bitter tears swelling in our eyes. I've been there a time or two...or a dozen. But no matter how hard I tried, those dreams just kept coming to the surface, pushing through all the mistrust and pain, begging to be heard and realized. So I stopped fighting them. It was scary, and exhilarating. I let my dreams see daylight and I fed them. I purposely set aside time every day to let them grow and see every detail in my mind, and feel how wonderful it would be to have them realized.
And to my great delight I discovered what power I have over my own life. The biggest and best of my dreams have been fulfilled, and more are on the way! After so many years of thinking that I would never have the life I dreamed of, I'm watching it unfold before me. I feel grateful and blessed, and I want to spread it around. Shout it from the rooftops! DARE TO DREAM, my friends!!!
So if you skipped over those questions I asked you at the beginning, go back and answer them now. Create a whole new great life for yourself. That's my dream for you....
Michelle
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Take Good Care of You
I have been reflecting on the things we do and say to ourselves when we have major disappointments or traumas. We are hurting and we need someone to blame, and you know who that 'someone' usually is? Yep, our own self. We beat our selves up emotionally and mentally.....sometimes even physically. We call ourselves every name in the book, tell ourselves how stupid we are, go into self destructive modes and tell ourselves that we aren't worthy of anything good. Okay, maybe you have never done this, and if that's true, then I am so proud of you. You are miles ahead of the rest of us! If you HAVE treated yourself this way, you are not alone. I have done and said those very things to myself in the past, and what I have learned is this: You will heal more quickly if you are kind and loving to yourself, and if you are non-judgmental of you.
When you berate yourself and talk mean to yourself, you set yourself for a lot more of what you just got. Other people who don't treat you with respect, spouses who let you down and don't keep their vows, bosses who take advantage of you and treat you like you are expendable.....the list goes on. Why do they treat us like that? We teach them to by the way we are treating ourselves.....and we think we deserve no better than that. They may not treat us with disrespect at first, but we have planted the seed in their head that we approve of being treated badly. Geez, we are even leading the way!
What if we turned it around? What if, instead of beating ourselves up for the latest crisis we are going through, we actually comforted and soothed our own selves? How different would THAT feel? I can tell you, I've done it both ways, and being kind to yourself puts you on a higher plain emotionally. And it takes you down a different, better, more emotionally sound road than you've ever been on.....so that brings better experiences than you've had before! Dare to dream, my friend!
Be your own best friend, your own protector, your biggest fan! Show yourself compassion and gentleness, just as you would extend to your dearest friend in the same situation. Get enough rest, eat good food, do something you enjoy, speak kindly to yourself in your head and heart, and forgive yourself of past mistakes. The past is over....the future is yours to write. And the one person who will always be with you, is YOU. Love and appreciate your constant companion for all the things you've learned, endured, accomplished and experienced.
You are fabulous, my friend!
Michelle
When you berate yourself and talk mean to yourself, you set yourself for a lot more of what you just got. Other people who don't treat you with respect, spouses who let you down and don't keep their vows, bosses who take advantage of you and treat you like you are expendable.....the list goes on. Why do they treat us like that? We teach them to by the way we are treating ourselves.....and we think we deserve no better than that. They may not treat us with disrespect at first, but we have planted the seed in their head that we approve of being treated badly. Geez, we are even leading the way!
What if we turned it around? What if, instead of beating ourselves up for the latest crisis we are going through, we actually comforted and soothed our own selves? How different would THAT feel? I can tell you, I've done it both ways, and being kind to yourself puts you on a higher plain emotionally. And it takes you down a different, better, more emotionally sound road than you've ever been on.....so that brings better experiences than you've had before! Dare to dream, my friend!
Be your own best friend, your own protector, your biggest fan! Show yourself compassion and gentleness, just as you would extend to your dearest friend in the same situation. Get enough rest, eat good food, do something you enjoy, speak kindly to yourself in your head and heart, and forgive yourself of past mistakes. The past is over....the future is yours to write. And the one person who will always be with you, is YOU. Love and appreciate your constant companion for all the things you've learned, endured, accomplished and experienced.
You are fabulous, my friend!
Michelle
Friday, January 7, 2011
What does THAT mean?
I changed the name of my blog today to 'Move On, Be Happy'. This the title of a future book, and my daughter Lindsey came up with the title. I like 'Survive and Thrive' but I also think that I am all about being happy, despite (or even because of) painful experiences, and helping others work toward happiness after their own tough situations.
'Move On, Be Happy' is a life project, but also a frame of mind. You know, when someone hurts you, the best revenge is to be happy. Take your life back. This takes time, but not as long as we all think it will.....it can be much quicker by deciding that you are going be fine-without 'so and so', rather than thinking they ruined your life. It does seem that way at first, I'm the first to admit. I've had my days and nights of sobbing and feeling like nothing would ever be okay again. If you're still in that stage, it's okay. It's normal to feel that way for a bit. The longer we stay there, though, we are stuck and can't move on. At first the pain is so raw and powerful that it feels way bigger than you, and it is important to acknowledge and respect your feelings. Later, it becomes a choice of whether we stay in that place or not.
I used to believe that I had no control over my life or what happened to me. I thought I could only react to whatever life gave me (or dumped on me). Yes, deciding how you are going to handle things is part of it. Part of life. How we handle things that happen to us, define who we are. But the other part of that is that we can attract and bring all great things we want into our lives. Don't roll your eyes.....we really can!
The Law of Attraction is a universal law, just like the Law of Gravity. Whatever we think about and focus on is what we attract. Like attracts Like. So if we are always thinking, "Nothing great ever happens to me," then the Universe has to obey. It also has to obey when we are always thinking, "Things always work out great for me, and I have a wonderful life." This is a broad statement, but try it with smaller things. Self talk is all important in moving on and being happy, so instead of saying to yourself, "I just can't win", try saying, "I have what it takes". Here's something even smaller-rather than, "This restaurant always messes up my order", try thinking and saying, "I always get great service, and I'm grateful for the great service I receive at this restaurant." It's a small thing that can have a big impact on your frame of mind and how you view your life.
It's so easy to look at the negative things that have happened. It takes effort to turn it around and focus and expect positive. And you, my friend, have what it takes!
There are many resources that explain the Law of Attraction, how it works and how you can make it work to your benefit. It works whether we want it to or not, or whether we believe it or not. You may as well make it work FOR you, rather than against you. There are websites, articles, book and movies all dedicated to understanding the Law of Attraction. Begin a quest to understand it for yourself, and you can create the kind of life you've always dreamed of having.
Michelle
Here's some links to learning more about the Law of Attraction:
http://scienceofgettingrich.net/
www.mrfire.com
http://www.thesecret.tv/
http://applying-the-law-of-attraction.com/
http://www.abundance-and-happiness.com/universal-laws.html
'Move On, Be Happy' is a life project, but also a frame of mind. You know, when someone hurts you, the best revenge is to be happy. Take your life back. This takes time, but not as long as we all think it will.....it can be much quicker by deciding that you are going be fine-without 'so and so', rather than thinking they ruined your life. It does seem that way at first, I'm the first to admit. I've had my days and nights of sobbing and feeling like nothing would ever be okay again. If you're still in that stage, it's okay. It's normal to feel that way for a bit. The longer we stay there, though, we are stuck and can't move on. At first the pain is so raw and powerful that it feels way bigger than you, and it is important to acknowledge and respect your feelings. Later, it becomes a choice of whether we stay in that place or not.
I used to believe that I had no control over my life or what happened to me. I thought I could only react to whatever life gave me (or dumped on me). Yes, deciding how you are going to handle things is part of it. Part of life. How we handle things that happen to us, define who we are. But the other part of that is that we can attract and bring all great things we want into our lives. Don't roll your eyes.....we really can!
The Law of Attraction is a universal law, just like the Law of Gravity. Whatever we think about and focus on is what we attract. Like attracts Like. So if we are always thinking, "Nothing great ever happens to me," then the Universe has to obey. It also has to obey when we are always thinking, "Things always work out great for me, and I have a wonderful life." This is a broad statement, but try it with smaller things. Self talk is all important in moving on and being happy, so instead of saying to yourself, "I just can't win", try saying, "I have what it takes". Here's something even smaller-rather than, "This restaurant always messes up my order", try thinking and saying, "I always get great service, and I'm grateful for the great service I receive at this restaurant." It's a small thing that can have a big impact on your frame of mind and how you view your life.
It's so easy to look at the negative things that have happened. It takes effort to turn it around and focus and expect positive. And you, my friend, have what it takes!
There are many resources that explain the Law of Attraction, how it works and how you can make it work to your benefit. It works whether we want it to or not, or whether we believe it or not. You may as well make it work FOR you, rather than against you. There are websites, articles, book and movies all dedicated to understanding the Law of Attraction. Begin a quest to understand it for yourself, and you can create the kind of life you've always dreamed of having.
Michelle
Here's some links to learning more about the Law of Attraction:
http://scienceofgettingrich.net/
www.mrfire.com
http://www.thesecret.tv/
http://applying-the-law-of-attraction.com/
http://www.abundance-and-happiness.com/universal-laws.html
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
New Year Reading List
I'm a book-aholic....non-recovering. Never want to. I love books! There, I said it. Curling up in a cotton quilt on my couch with a novel...pure heaven.
I love novels, and I also love non-fiction. Especially if if they can help me get to my intentions. So today I want to share my book choices for the new year. If you never pick up a book, let this be the year that you do. There are treasures on the pages of good books just waiting for you to claim.
Non-Fiction
The Success Principles by Jack Canfield. If you only read one book this year, I recommend you read this one. The subtitle is 'How to Get From Where You Are to Where You Want to Be'. Jack Canfield has lived through much worse than I have and you'd never know it by how grounded, successful and happy he is. Jack is truly an inspiration and an expert on getting everything you want in life, no matter how big it is. I love his style of writing. He has a version just for teens called 'The Success Principles for Teens' that we bought all our teenage kids for Christmas.
The Attractor Factor by Joe Vitale. This is the book my son let me borrow back in July and it started me on a different, better path for my life. Dr. Vitale is warm and has a great way of explaining how to attract everything you want in life
The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. I enjoyed the book and LOVED the movie. If you have to choose, watch the movie.
Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. This book is a classic and has been updated with examples for today's world. It's about a lot more than growing rich with money....it's about growing rich in every area of your life.
How to Survive the Loss of a Love by Melba Colgrove. One of my friends gave me this book many years ago and I still think about the good practical advice I got. It's a short read, and it's all about healing and feeling better after surviving a loss. Love this book. So if you have just suffered a break up or death of your loved one, this book really does help.
Fiction
September by Rosamunde Pilcher. Set in Scotland, this novel is why I want to go on a trip there so bad. Delicious read.
A is for Alibi by Sue Grafton. This begins the alphabet series of her main character, private detective Kinsey Milhone. I've been reading and loving this series for years. The next is 'B is for Burglar', 'C is for Corpse' and so on. I think Sue is at 'U' in this series. These are just fun PI books set in Southern California....probably fueled my desire to become a PI.
There are many more great novels I've read, and perhaps I'll recommend more later in the year.
Happy Reading, my friend.
Michelle
I love novels, and I also love non-fiction. Especially if if they can help me get to my intentions. So today I want to share my book choices for the new year. If you never pick up a book, let this be the year that you do. There are treasures on the pages of good books just waiting for you to claim.
Non-Fiction
The Success Principles by Jack Canfield. If you only read one book this year, I recommend you read this one. The subtitle is 'How to Get From Where You Are to Where You Want to Be'. Jack Canfield has lived through much worse than I have and you'd never know it by how grounded, successful and happy he is. Jack is truly an inspiration and an expert on getting everything you want in life, no matter how big it is. I love his style of writing. He has a version just for teens called 'The Success Principles for Teens' that we bought all our teenage kids for Christmas.
The Attractor Factor by Joe Vitale. This is the book my son let me borrow back in July and it started me on a different, better path for my life. Dr. Vitale is warm and has a great way of explaining how to attract everything you want in life
The Secret by Rhonda Byrne. I enjoyed the book and LOVED the movie. If you have to choose, watch the movie.
Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill. This book is a classic and has been updated with examples for today's world. It's about a lot more than growing rich with money....it's about growing rich in every area of your life.
How to Survive the Loss of a Love by Melba Colgrove. One of my friends gave me this book many years ago and I still think about the good practical advice I got. It's a short read, and it's all about healing and feeling better after surviving a loss. Love this book. So if you have just suffered a break up or death of your loved one, this book really does help.
Fiction
September by Rosamunde Pilcher. Set in Scotland, this novel is why I want to go on a trip there so bad. Delicious read.
A is for Alibi by Sue Grafton. This begins the alphabet series of her main character, private detective Kinsey Milhone. I've been reading and loving this series for years. The next is 'B is for Burglar', 'C is for Corpse' and so on. I think Sue is at 'U' in this series. These are just fun PI books set in Southern California....probably fueled my desire to become a PI.
There are many more great novels I've read, and perhaps I'll recommend more later in the year.
Happy Reading, my friend.
Michelle
Sunday, January 2, 2011
A New Beginning
I don't make New Year's resolutions anymore. I set intentions. "I intend to...."
It's like I've already decided I'm going to do something. For me, "I intend to...." has more power than "I want to..." or "I resolve to..."
There have been years in the past when my 'intention' was simply to endure the year. Didn't make any goals, didn't care about much. So if you can relate to that, read on.
We all need things to look forward to in order to have any kind of excitement for life. Even just a little spark of excitement requires that we are looking forward to something in the future. Something that is fun or exciting or comforting.
So what do you really want? Is that a loaded question, or what?!
Several years ago, in the time right after I first learned of my former husband's infidelity, the thing I wanted most in my life was PEACE. I wanted to feel peaceful in my heart and in my head. Whenever I was asked, 'What do you want?", that's the word that popped into my head. PEACE. So I began looking for things that would help me feel peace. I had no idea how I was going to find, I just knew that I wanted it more than anything else.
So it is with anything we want. Whether it's a new job, a vacation to somewhere that you have always wanted to go, a loving relationship in your life, or an abundance of money...you don't have to know how you are going to accomplish it, we only need to set our intention for what we want and begin listening to our intuition about steps to take to get us there. Our brains do not like a vacuum, and it will work double time to close the gap from where you are to where you'd like to be. You'll start getting new ideas of how you can accomplish what you intend to have or make happen. Listen to those ideas and then act! I believe they come from a higher power who knows more that we do. It's like getting advice from the ultimate life coach.
Each new year is new beginning....don't you love it?! It's unwritten and you get to write it! I know that it can feel impossible to pull yourself up out of depression and pain. I also know that it is NOT impossible. It only feels like it, and feelings can change. How do I know that? Because I now have peace in my heart and in my head. Peace, glorious peace! So get on the elevator and come up and away from all the things that hurt you. Plan something that you can look forward to and get excited about it. Plan one thing or many things....plan one thing for every month! Think what a great year you'll have.
May you find your hearts desire this year, my friend. Happy New Year!
Michelle
It's like I've already decided I'm going to do something. For me, "I intend to...." has more power than "I want to..." or "I resolve to..."
There have been years in the past when my 'intention' was simply to endure the year. Didn't make any goals, didn't care about much. So if you can relate to that, read on.
We all need things to look forward to in order to have any kind of excitement for life. Even just a little spark of excitement requires that we are looking forward to something in the future. Something that is fun or exciting or comforting.
So what do you really want? Is that a loaded question, or what?!
Several years ago, in the time right after I first learned of my former husband's infidelity, the thing I wanted most in my life was PEACE. I wanted to feel peaceful in my heart and in my head. Whenever I was asked, 'What do you want?", that's the word that popped into my head. PEACE. So I began looking for things that would help me feel peace. I had no idea how I was going to find, I just knew that I wanted it more than anything else.
So it is with anything we want. Whether it's a new job, a vacation to somewhere that you have always wanted to go, a loving relationship in your life, or an abundance of money...you don't have to know how you are going to accomplish it, we only need to set our intention for what we want and begin listening to our intuition about steps to take to get us there. Our brains do not like a vacuum, and it will work double time to close the gap from where you are to where you'd like to be. You'll start getting new ideas of how you can accomplish what you intend to have or make happen. Listen to those ideas and then act! I believe they come from a higher power who knows more that we do. It's like getting advice from the ultimate life coach.
Each new year is new beginning....don't you love it?! It's unwritten and you get to write it! I know that it can feel impossible to pull yourself up out of depression and pain. I also know that it is NOT impossible. It only feels like it, and feelings can change. How do I know that? Because I now have peace in my heart and in my head. Peace, glorious peace! So get on the elevator and come up and away from all the things that hurt you. Plan something that you can look forward to and get excited about it. Plan one thing or many things....plan one thing for every month! Think what a great year you'll have.
May you find your hearts desire this year, my friend. Happy New Year!
Michelle
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